NintendoGal Turns To Body-Related Game Advertising

Andrea Campton, better known on NintendoGal.com and the internet at large as Nintendo Gal, announced today that she will be putting down her pen and paper, leaving the world for the more engaging and intellectually stimulating world of using one’s body to promote probably unrelated goods.

According to the press release accompanying this announcement, "sexual magnetism is the only way to sell hardcore games to core audiences and that there’s a definite void that needs to be filled". The release cites the fact that 99% percent of shoppers would like to be exposed to more graphic, provocative and degenerative advertisements; the data was provided by MadeUpData, the world’s #1 source of relevant information for the past 500 years.

Her first project will be promoting an assuredly awesome game entitled Catering to the Harcore 5,000, a title expected to appeal to the most hardcore and patient of Nintendo fans; according to NeoGAF, many fans are already getting themselves psyched up for the disappointment of hearing the title has been delayed.

When asked for comment, Andrea commented that "I feel it’s important to use what God gave me before time runs out and I become an old prune," despite being several years too late for that. Chief editor status of the site will fall to one of the remaining employees, to be decided following a no-holds-barred deathmatch.

Upon receiving news of Andrea’s career choice, Reggie Fils-Aime, president of Nintendo of America, commented "Who?"

Here’s the full press release:

FEDERAL WAY, Wash., April 1, 2009 – NintendoGal.com a subsidiary of Nintendo Gal announced today that its chief operating officer, Andrea Campton, will no longer be participating in journalism or writing of any kind.  Instead, the focus will be shifting to promotion of games through various methods of utilizing the female body.

"I feel it’s important to use what God gave me before time runs out and I become an old prune," said Andrea Campton, Nintendo Gal’s chief operating officer.

Nintendo Gal reports that sexual magnetism is the only way to sell hardcore games to core audiences and that there’s a definite void that needs to be filled.  According to data correlated by MadeUpData, a firm that specializes in making statistics fit where you need them to, 99% of shoppers polled felt they weren’t bombarded enough with provocative advertisements.

The company will be leading the way in this style of promotion and has released a video of the hottest game yet to be released on Nintendo’s Wii™, Catering to the Hardcore 5,000.

About Nintendo Gal: The Washington State company of awesome that fully owns and operates NintendoGal.com since 2005.  It produces news, reviews, and other various forms of articles for its readership.  Not a household name, but held in high regard to the one or two people who follow the site.  For more information about Nintendo Gal, visit the web site at www.nintendogal.com.